This past week, my husband surprised me with exciting news.
"How about we both clear our schedules for just two days and get away? Just the two of us! We'll take a break from the kids, from our work and from the hectic pace of life and just enjoy each other's company."
The words were music to my ears. Every marriage expert suggests this—and for good reason—to reignite the marriage and recharge the batteries. But until we were actually in the car waving goodbye to our children on that Sunday afternoon, I didn't quite believe it would happen.
Our destination—a surprise for me, and chosen by my husband—was the beautiful scenic setting of Niagara Falls, just one-and-a-half hours away from our home. It was a perfect choice—far enough to feel like we got away but not too far to feel like we couldn't keep tabs on the kids, or return if we were unexpectedly needed. The plan was that we would be gone from Sunday afternoon until Monday night, long enough to get a fresh breather on life, but short enough for both of us to make adequate arrangements in our work schedules so we wouldn't be noticeably missed.
My husband planned our entire itinerary, filling our days with activities and tours that were a mixture of fun-filled and enjoyable as well as picturesque and relaxing. He also organized all the food and eating arrangements. I couldn't believe all the small details he thought of in advance, and all his research and co-ordination to make our trip as spectacular as it was. In his characteristic way, he thought of everything, and the two days away were absolute bliss, recharging and reinvigorating both of us.
On the way back, I, once again, expressed my gratitude to my husband for making this trip so memorable and we both resolved to do this more often.
"But do you know what I really liked the best?" I asked him. His curiosity was piqued as I continued. "It was the fact that you took the initiative to do this! Even if the trip wasn't as perfect or as well-planned as it was, even if the accommodations wouldn't have been as scenic, or even if there would have been glitches in our itinerary, to me, it still would have been perfect, because you took the time and effort to show that our relationship was important to you. It means the world to me—even if everything had gone wrong—that you arranged this for me!"
So what's my message here?
First, for all those husbands reading this—take the initiative to show your wife that your relationship is a priority to you. A couple days away would be a great place to start. But if that is not possible, in however you decide to show that you care, don't feel daunted by the expectation that it needs to be something extraordinary. Just the fact that you are taking the first step and that you are using your ingenuity will make her feel incredibly cared for and special.
I also was thinking that our connection with G‑d is a "relationship" too. G‑d tells us: "Open for me just the tip of a needle and I will open for you a floodgate."
Of course, G‑d can make any necessary "arrangements" in our lives far better and more perfectly than we can. But perhaps, we are being asked to "clear some time from our schedule," to demonstrate that our relationship with our Creator is a real and important part of our lives.
Perhaps, here too, our efforts need not be perfect. Our deeds need not have the backdrop of perfect, picturesque scenery. The arrangements need not even be glitch-free.
We simply have to take the initiative.
